Other stuff- favorite sites and other features. All links open in a new window. eventually
there will be descriptions.
Daily
'zines
and weblogs:.
zulkey
gawker
the black table
flak
magazine
haypenny
uber
neal pollack
eyeshot
ben
brown
lockhart
steele
off
on a tangent
left
pedal
whatever-whenever
maud
newton
yankee
pot roast
matt
tobey
the
morning news
flavorpill
deckie
holmes
wwkad?
sarah
balcomb
the
wicked
TMFTML
elizabeth
spiers
bunsen
whatevs.org
traveler's
diagram
jeans
and a tshirt
f
train
scott
writes
dong
resin
tremble
girls
are pretty
utter
wonder
catherine's
pita
casa
de punk
information
leafblower
number
one hit song
the
kicker
coolfer
the
fold drop
zack
i
keep a diary
ultragrrrl
this
is not a pipe
monosyllabic
tale
of two cities
television
solar system
old
hag
que
sera sera
the
blueprint
stereogum
the
sticking point
Other 'zines and weblogs:
less frequent, still great.
kittenpants
pindeldyboz
the
big jewel
jest
magazine
the
plug
david
barringer
stevie
k.
yank
the chain
quality
lit
opium
the
simon
other
people's stories
found
magazine
really
small talk
mr.
beller's neighborhood
whittlz
(parenthetical
note)
knot
magazine
so
new media
break
up girl
sparks
fly up
serial
text
me
three
viceland
maura.com
miami
stories
reinventing
the world
monkeybicycle
Misc sites -
Ex
Christian.net - bitter yet cathartic.
the
english server - one of my first favorite websites.
this
american life - listen online while you clean.
lynne
spears' weblog - the horror, the horror.
Bands
and Music
not even close to complete.
the
information
coup
fourre
pilot
to gunner
crooked
fingers
believe
in toledo
the
rock coaches
the
cignal
the
coastal drag
flaming
lips
neutral
milk hotel
the
wicked
the
modern age
jenyk
melody
nelson
new
york doll
tiny
mix tapes
filter
pitchfork
w.a.s.t.e.
NME
q
magazine
earlash
the
pill
crashin'
in
kingblind
asobi
seksu
hard
glitter
ultragrrrl
cock
of the block
Brooklyn and beyond
free
williamsburg
billburg
block
magazine
little
gray books
cobble
hill cinemas - five dollar movies in nyc!
pete's
candy store
northsix
galapagos
southpaw
office
ops
the
madagascar institute
housingworks
PS
1
Comedy
and comedians
bob
and david
christian
finnegan
ed
herro
eugene
mirman
patton
oswalt
irritable
colon
todd
barry
corn
mo
eating
it
tinkle
the
people's improv theater
ucb
demetri
martin
jesse
popp
david
feldman
Clips - stuff
I wrote for other sites.
for flak magazine:
review
of "for love or money"
weekly
column about the tv series Joe Millionaire,
installments 1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6
and 7.
review
of the anniversary party
review of blow
review
of moulin rouge
for the black table:
waxing
off: the superbowl
waxing
off: self-love
waxing
off: summer camp
weekly
column about the craig's list
website:
january
31
february
7
february
14
february
21
february
28
march
7
march
14
march
21
march
28
april
18
very
small contribution to first BT cheap beer review
for haypenny:
if
my mom wrote a sex advice column
for kittenpants:
re
"print" of above - if my mom...
for uber:
new
instant messenger acronyms (with Claire Zulkey)
for mcsweeney's:
alternative
anniversary gift traditions
for eyeshot:
four
new noble professions
grab
bag :
an
interview with me at zulkey.com
a
song about me by the band and comedy team irritable
colon - and songs about other people too.
mean things people wrote about me on craig's list while
I was writing the craig's list column - I wish I'd thought
to save them all:
lindsay
reads cl to get guys - but of course.
lindsay
looks 35 - but I got carded for American Beauty!
missus
robertson - I wish I had a comp lit degree!
the
old site - what I ate for breakfast, Dec. 2000-
present
pictures
- oh, to be a rodeo queen.
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the L word- Links,
events, anecdotes, experiments, bad advice, esoteric
gossip, and gushy worship of my favorite things. updated daily and spell checked
for your pleasure!
What you're looking at now is just the archive of the stuff I wrote from December 18, 2003 - January 30, 2004. My current and updated site, Lindsayism.com, IS RIGHT HERE.
Attention all HBO On-Demand Users:
Okay, it's a 1993 documentary and it's called By Satan Possessed.
It's a documentary about Satanists Among Us. And you need to order it as soon as possible because I watched it yesterday and it's the funniest thing I've ever seen. And it's not just a one-trick pony, either. It gets funnier and funnier as it goes along, finally reaching an unbelievable and hilarious climax. I was under the impression that 1993 was part of the Age of Irony, but apparently not so much if this was a real documentary. I'm telling you: the Spinal Tap/Guffmann/Best in Show/Mighty Wind guys could do a shot-for-shot remake of this thing using actors, and you wouldn't be able to tell which was the doc and which was the mock. It's so dated, too - like, nobody believes Multiple Personality Disorder exists anymore! (and that sucks, because it's the most hilarious disease of all). This show gave me the idea for a one-woman theater project called "Multiple Personality Disorder: The Musical."
(Sorry about yesterday. I was experiencing a Chinese Food Consumption Related allergic reaction. See? I told you I shouldn't eat that stuff. (But thanks for dinner, Ben!)
I know we all read The Onion, but I just have to say this is my favorite one in a long time.
( But what if God sees me as a slut?)
Sometimes I google too much. Like today:
Christian Advice on "How To Be Attractive"
Now that I'm on a "movies I loved in college" kick, what the fuck ever happened to Whit Stillman? I just googled that very phrase (without the expletive) and unearthed an essay arguing that Stillman's trilogy was Christian, and this fan page bearing recent news that Stillman is working on a Jane Austen adaptation. I'm widely known for my refusal to see period films (Dangerous Liasons doesn't count), but I might check that one out.
uh oh, time for a Kicking and Screaming quote:
"I'm nostalgic for conversations I had yesterday. I've begun reminiscing events before they even occur. I'm reminiscing this right now. I can't go to the bar because I've already looked back on it in my memory...and I didn't have a good time."
The site 1115.org asked bloggers for their Guilty Pleasures last week, and I did one but forgot to link to it! Maybe it was subconsciously because mine is the most embarrassing of all.
Here they are. (oh, and btw, Kicking and Screaming is not a "guilty pleasure." Kicking and Screaming is a cinematic masterpiece!)
Somebody should make a "free Winona"-style tshirt with Claire Danes on it and "Homewrecker" underneath.
Information Round Up
New York Doll's write-up and pictures. What does a guy have to do to stop being compared to Judd Nelson? More, it seems. He's the one I would have gone out with in The Breakfast Club anyway, so maybe it's apropos.
Jenyk's pics of the show are up. I think Jenyk hearts the girls.
Another gushy Weekly Dig article Only read it if you're really really interested in the Boston music scene. Really, really interested. Like, more interested than me. Or probably the band itself.
Hi. Test. No Subject. (Yawn.)
Viruses are so last year. I don't understand why these virus makers don't get more creative. They could turn us all into unwitting participants in a massive social experiment/soap opera, but instead they mess up our computers. Ooooh! How brilliant!
If they really wanted to fuck with everyone and change the course of history, they would make one of these:
Two Suggested Viruses
*A virus that sends out every saved draft email to its originally intended recipient.
*A virus that sends the last twenty emails you've sent out, to everyone in your address book.
Jobs would be lost, relationships would disintegrate, tears would be shed, phone lines would be tied up for hours. And the whole damn thing could be sponsored by an alcohol company.
I just had this little fantasy that Peter Sarsgaard googled "Peter Sarsgaard" "Oscar" and "Robbed" and found this site and dumped Maggie Gyllenhaal for me. He's so on my "list."
Oscar Nominees, yawn. These are going to be the most boring Oscars ever. Big Fish and Peter Sarsgaard were robbed. Though it's exciting that Errol Morris might take home his first Oscar ever (for The Fog of War) this year.
It has been an unbelievable week for Low Culture. If I were the kind of person who said "LOL" (except in person, because I think that's funny), I would say that now.
A new one for me:
Blogging about someone who is in the same room blogging about me.
My head hurts.
The Simple Life: Another Unfunny Post
You know that question: If there was a fire and you could only save X-number of things, what would you save? I sort of answered that for myself this weekend, when I had to remove everything I cared about from my burned-out apartment in a very small amount of time, without the use of a truck or much of anywhere to store it (I don't move into my new place for another week.) Turns out, when I was done, more than half of my belongings remained unpacked and mostly uncared about. Some things I had to save, or I would have needed therapy to get over the loss:
-Letters and diaries going back to 7th grade, including an extremely well-documented junior year of high school, complete with bad poetry, daily diary entries, tortured love letters, photos, and even the flannel shirt my boyfriend wore every day that year. And the poem I wrote the day Kurt Cobain died. An example of it's terribleness, the last line:
"And then you whispered: 'Nevermind'." (gag)
-The polaroids I took every day from January 1 - April 1, 2002, which include my only existing artifacts of a good friend I'll never see again.
-The diaries of my first year in New York.
-The large plastic bag containing September 11 artifacts, including the dust mask I wore.
-My personally signed Kurt Vonnegut first editions, my original issues of Might Magazine, my limited edition David Cross poster, and every issue of McSweeney's.
Not much else mattered, yet so much remained. I never would have thrown out the stuff I lost, but I should have. It feels kind of good not to be so tied down by "stuff." (It will feel even better, however, to LIVE SOMEWHERE. Just one more week...)
My friend Bryan, who, coincidentally, will be the first male featured in "Date My Friend", has just launched his own dating website, and I like it:
Love In War: "Dating for the Agitated."
Last Names It Would Suck To Coincidentally Have:
Buttafuoco
Sharpton
Conger
Durst
Nolte
Stapp
McVeigh
Swayze
Bush
I got an idea for a website. Two, actually:
"dontcallhim.com" and "dontcallher.com" You go there, and read a manifesto on why you should not call the person you want to call but shouldn't (like your ex). The original idea came when my friend Jeremy got three calls in one night from a girl he'd JUST started dating and I said "Dude, she shouldn't call you, she should call me, and I'll tell her why she shouldn't call you." (The original idea was for operators to be standing by to tell people how to play their current romantic situation. 1-900-LUVADVICE.)
But back to the website: maybe there would be little tabs you could click on that corresponded to your situation. "Because he's an asshole", "Because of that restraining order", "Because it's only been twenty minutes", "Because you already left her three messages." Etc.
In college, after turning on the movie Ghost one day when it was halfway over, I invented a little game where you come in in the middle of that movie and watch it as if you have no idea that Swayze is dead. It's a tiny, teensy bit funny. Seriously. Especially when he's talking to Demi and she's not responding, or when he tries to move the soda can in the subway, etc. My friend Christy brought this game up the other day, because she had a (much better) one:
Watch the movie 21 Grams, and pretend that Sean Penn is his character from I Am Sam. I didn't realize anything could make the former movie into a laugh fest, but that just might.
I participated in a Focus Group about mp3 players the other day. It turned out to be for Sony's as-yet-unreleased version, The Walkman. (My contribution was to suggest that Walk man was sexist and should be changed to Walk person. But I was kidding.)
So I was doodling on the legal pad they provided to each of us. You know, writing "Lindsay Moretti. Lindsay Robertson Moretti. Lindsay Moretti ( ne Robertson)", etc and since at one point we talked about the iRiver mp3 player, I of course wrote "Cry Me An Iriver" really big and then drew around it for a while, totally planning to throw the page away. But at the end of the session the director-guy said "Be sure to leave your notes on the table when you leave," so I tried to cross stuff out but it was too late!
Being Creatively Fulfilled Is the New Being In Love
I haven't been posting because for part of this week I've been working as a writer in the popular culture industry, and I've been having soooo much fun. I actually got paid to see a teen movie (suckers!) called The Girl Next Door. It was ridiculous and sometimes cheesy, but it had some great lines and, well, I loved every minute of it. (I just read that it was written by the guys who brought us Van Wilder and Saving Ryan's Privates.) And it stars the sleazy bad boy of my fake celebrity harem, Go's Timothy Olyphant.
(Isn't it cute that I felt the need to say "fake" up there?)
I really am THAT busy. No site today either. And if I owe you an email, I'm sorry!
No site today, too busy. Thanks to everyone who came out last night!
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